Hope-Filled Christian
Hope-Filled Christian
The Power of Humility in Manifesting Miracles
Is it possible for our faith and obedience to play a part in divine miracles? We've recently been grappling with sickness and stagnation, which led us to reflect deeply on this question and on one of the most miraculous stories in the Bible - Jesus feeding thousands with just five loaves of bread and two fish. The young boy's innocent faith and his willingness to offer his small lunch was pivotal to this miracle. It's a beautiful illustration of how God can use our obedience and faith to bring His divine plan to fruition.
What does it mean to acknowledge our own worthlessness and yet, at the same time, understand our identity in God? It's a profound paradox we've been wrestling with, and in this episode, we explore the anxiety of feeling unable to repay God and the fear of embracing our own worthlessness. We also discuss the importance of a strong relationship with God to steer clear of entitlement. As a quick note, we'd like to extend our sincere apologies if there was any confusion caused by our previous episode. We hope this episode helps deepen your faith and understanding of God's grace and divine plan. Thank you for joining us and may God bless you.
Hi and welcome back to HFC. Sorry for not being here for two weeks. I'll start with that and laughing, because that's a nervous laugh. But yeah, I was sick one week and then the next week. Honestly, I had recorded something but it just didn't feel up to standard. So then these past couple of days I've just been kind of like a mess because I'm like I don't know what to talk about, or that's what I felt like. At least I didn't know what to share. But it seems like a lot of what I'm hearing lately has to do with and maybe it's because we're towards the end of this year. But I mean, I guess that doesn't even really work because a lot of the messages I've been listening to are old, they're not even like recent. But having to do with the idea of miracles and the plan of God, excuse me, yeah, like I said, sorry for not being here. I was sick one week, like so out of it, I was literally exhausted. I like slept through it Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon and then I was just passing out, like every day. And then Thanksgiving week I just don't know if it's too busy. I don't know what it was. Maybe I'm okay. I was kind of like in it. It's really very stagnant, just like in a weird funk, I guess. Anyway, like I said, a lot of what I've been hearing lately are talking about God's plans and having a respect for God. So to start with, we'll start off with some basics of God doing a miracle.
Speaker 1:So this past Sunday our pastor was giving a message on Thanksgiving and the entire time all they kept coming into my head was John 612. Because he had read, like John's six something through, like I don't know. He stopped early and I was like no, no, no, no, no. Like I remember there being a part where something powerful was said and I get it. His focus was on Thanksgiving. So it wasn't really around what I was looking for, but it was like my spirit was hungry for something and I couldn't figure out what it was and I just kept reading and reading and reading and I came to John 612, which says when they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples gather the pieces that are left over, let nothing be wasted.
Speaker 1:And it's that part. It's not even like it's. It kind of feels like you just read over it. So yeah, so everybody had enough to eat. That's, that's super cool. Yay, they got enough to eat. But if you go back, if you go back to John 611. So we take into consideration that it's in John 611,.
Speaker 1:It says Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted. He did the same with the fish. So not only did he give them as much as they wanted, John 612 goes on to say not only did they get as much as they wanted, they all had enough to eat. So even if somebody was like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna take, I'm gonna take basket after basket after basket after basket after basket after basket after basket, you still have everybody having enough to eat.
Speaker 1:And what's so amazing is because in John 6, where is it? John 6, I think yeah, nine, john 6, nine. He says here's a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish. But how far were they go among so many? So, literally like seconds ago probably. This probably took a while. I mean, handing out food to thousands of people, probably like 15,000 people would have taken forever. So it's like just moments before they were like, yeah, we have small, this small, that small barley loaves, small fish, like we're going to feed these people, and asking you know how, how far is this even going to go? This probably make it like 10 people. But not only did it make it, you know, to everybody. Everybody had as much as they wanted and everybody was fed.
Speaker 1:And so what? The note that I made when I was reading, as they were satisfied even with the little they had, or a little that was available, because of God's grace. It was because of God's grace that this Five small barley loves into fish became enough, in fact, more than enough. More than enough to the point where, you know, there was those extra baskets and God and Jesus was kind of flexing and saying like look, not only do we feed the thousands, there's 12, so that you guys can have leftovers, you disciples, you doubters, and and there's a part of me, like I even wrote the note, but I feel like we always kind of get this that there is a part on us, or what I read John 6 to know, I know it was everyone focuses on Jesus working the miracle, but the miracle can happen unless we choose to offer God what little we have, just like the little boy did, and that's true. There is, there's, you know, that obedience that we have to have the lack of doubt and just saying I'm gonna bring this to Offering you know what God has called me to do? Because in obedience, and and the part that struck me was this little boy. Why? Why is a little boy? Because little kids have that weird like.
Speaker 1:There's something beautiful about the way little kids think. They don't necessarily have all that doubt and negativity that adults have, where they're like, oh, that's not enough, it's like we might as well just quit, kind of thing. Like when they've been through struggles and and have failed and haven't succeeded, whether, like you know what, it's not even worth the trouble because there's no point. They kind of just see a Need and they're like you see a kid get hurt and they're like I don't know what to do, but I'm gonna give you a hug and ask if you're okay. I'm gonna be sweet and, you know, like loving, even though you know that may not even do anything, it may not feel like enough. They're offering it because it's what they have and there's something beautiful about the way kids think and it's just like how does it come about that we stop thinking in that way, where we stop offering what we have and we're so obsessed with oh, I can't cover all of it, so I'm not gonna do any of it.
Speaker 1:And it's like Going back to the idea that we're the body of Christ, that we're not Solitary in this. Not only are we not solidifying this fact because we have God, we're not solidifying this because we may not be the only ones that God is calling to do something. We may just be a part of this big Cycle, this big wheel, this big motion that a God has going on, and because we're not doing our part, then it's not building up to what it should have been. And and I've just been hearing reading a lot about miracles and Something kind of like knocked me out of my feeling of you know, I Was listening to this person speak and they were talking about you know, a lot of people have this idea that, oh, god has called me to do this and and they, they make it to where they are Prideful.
Speaker 1:Oh God has a plan for me, god has this for me. And it becomes this thing where you're like, almost like, this Idea of being infallible comes upon us, where we think we can't fail. We're not gonna fail, we can't fall because God has this plan for us. And I'm not gonna lie. It's happened to me as well, and I'm sure it's happened to all of us at some point in our lives. But it's like this idea comes upon us because we see that God is trying to use us, that we think, oh, god sees something special in me. I must be great, I must be amazing, I must be something awesome.
Speaker 1:We begin to get lured in by the sense of ego, the sense of pride, the sense of all of that, instead realizing that, hmm, you know how being humble about that. And it's that same idea of pride that later messes us up, because later on, when we're trying to do these things that God has called us to do, we believe that God has, you know, selected us and that it's only because of us and because of this whole idea of pride that has pervaded our thoughts, where we believe that, you know, only we can do this, only we have been chosen to do this, that we begin to take it upon ourselves to say oh, god has chosen me, so it must be something about me. In reality, it's not anything about us and it has everything to do with him. And so there's, there's a big issue that comes about because People keep getting these thoughts of oh, it's me, it's me, it's me, god chose me, I must be special, I must have this. And because of that pride, when troubles come later on, we begin to think oh yes, god chose me, so I must have to figure this out, not realizing that a lot of times those troubles that come about, is God trying to kind of say hey, this isn't you, this is me working through you, I have chosen you for something. Now let's do it. And and a lot of times, because we think there's something so innately special about us that and I'm not saying there's not something special about you there is everybody's individual and different and all that stuff that God has made each and every one of us in his own image. But at the same time, I think the thing we have to realize is sometimes we begin to think that at least I do. I begin to think, oh, I'm good because God has chosen me and I'm fine and I'm gonna be alright, and all this stuff. But not realizing that just because I'm saved doesn't mean that what I'm doing has to succeed.
Speaker 1:There was a verse that I was reading in a book. I literally I would. I can't read it right now because my room is pitch black, because I'm having, like, I'm telling you, these past weeks for my podcast. My life has been fine but for my podcast has just been absolutely terrible, sick and then, just, you know, I literally could not think of anything. I was, I like wrote, I did this verse that, like, I mean, it just came out so forced and I was just like you know, I'm not gonna offer up anything less than what God deserves, I'm just not going to it. Just, it was not worth your time and it was downright almost just I don't know, it was disappointing, but I would read the verse. But it's from this book called Off God and it was talking about how not everyone who goes to heaven lives in the same way, because a lot of people tend to think that, oh, we're all gonna have the same experience in heaven. But there is a verse that he mentions and if I can't even read it, oh my god, forgive me, lord we talks about how there are those who that, when they go through the, the fire of judgment, and their and their things are tested. The things that they've done, their works, are tested and their intentions are tested, what they've done, things for tested, whether or not they could have done more is tested and when that is tested it reveals their true worth, are not worth, but something that's gonna sound so bad, but it it was so cool because it was like.
Speaker 1:So often we begin to think because God is using me and he's doing something that you know, I'm fine, god's using me, I'm fine. God just used me to speak to that person. I'm good. God is using me, not realizing that just because God is using you and that you're saved doesn't mean you know that your eternity is gonna be all that great. There is a part to us that has to become humble, become a servant. We we get so caught up in the pride and the ego of serving and oh, god is using me, oh God is doing that that we failed to see the servant hood part of it.
Speaker 1:A lot of times I try to keep my mind focused on the idea that I'm not worthy. I'm not, that nothing I can do can make me worthy, and a lot of times I feel like the devil tries to and demons or spirits try to put in that thought of me that you're not perfect and they try to use it in a negative way. So I veer away from using that because I know that if I say it, I'm afraid that I'm going to confirm what they're saying and that I'm gonna feel worthless. But the point in the truth of the matter is that I am worthless. I'm worth less than God, and there's nothing wrong with admitting that. There's nothing wrong with admitting that I'm not as great as him, that I am corruptible, I am failable, that I need him admitting the need that I cannot succeed without you God, admitting the need that I cannot do these things without you God, that it's not by some coincidence and it's not by some luck that I came upon where I am at this moment, lord, that it's every bit by his grace and his mercy that I am where I am today.
Speaker 1:And there's just such a need to realize that we are so lucky to be chosen, we are so blessed to be chosen by God for certain things, and we need to really keep that in perspective. We need to really keep in perspective that, yes, well, the miracle can't happen without our obedience, that God deserves our obedience. It's not something like, oh yeah, god needs me. It's like it's more of a my God needs me, the God who saved me from eternal death, the God who saved me from eternal hell. The God who brought me through all of the troubles that I went through. The God that has seen me and loved me and knows me and knows my true identity and knows who I am inside, knows me better than I know myself. The God who has saved me from situations where there was no way I was getting out. The God who has watched over me and blessed me and given me his favor. That God needs me A sense of what can I do God? How can I help you? And it's just like dangerous ideas that are in our head.
Speaker 1:Like I said, the fear of admitting that we're worthless, the fear of realizing that we're worth less than God. If we admit that, then somehow Satan has power over us. He doesn't have power over us because it's not myself that I do things. I can do things, I can do all things to Christ, who gives me strength. It's not I can do all things to myself. So it doesn't matter if I'm worthless. It doesn't matter if I'm powerless, because the God who stands before me has power. It's not my own power. I am powerless, but I am empowered by God. I am weak, but I am strengthened by God. It's not through my own identity. It's not through my own self that I speak. It's through Christ who covers me, it's through Christ who shrouds me. And so, in my identity as my name, adrian, it's on my identity as a co-heir with Christ that I speak. It's on my identity of whatever I want to call my age, my gender, my sex. I don't know any of those things. It's not on any of those things that give me power. It's on any of those things that make me worth anything.
Speaker 1:I am worth less than God and it's when we admit that and we begin to bring that in. I am worthless and I am weaker than you. But I don't do things in my own accord. I don't do things through my own power. I don't fight battles in and of myself. At my base, I am worthless At my base. I am weak At my base. I am susceptible. At my base, I would have made the same mistake that Adam and Eve made so many years ago. At my base, you could have tricked me and tied me up. You could have killed, destroyed, stolen me, but I'm not at my base. It's not just me here, it's the Holy Spirit that lives within me. It's Jesus that shrouds and veils me, it's Jesus, whose identity he has given to share with me.
Speaker 1:So there's nothing wrong with realizing that we by ourselves are worthless, because we are. We are worthless than God, and there's nothing wrong about admitting that because we're not alone. In the Bible it mentions that we are the bride and he is the groom, and that when people are married together they become one. And so when we become married together, when we have that deep relationship, it's not ourselves that we're speaking from. We're speaking from a new perspective. We are no longer ourselves. We are now one with God. We are now brought in unity with Jesus. We have the same authority and power he has because we are together. But when that relationship weakens, that's when we begin to get worthless and become powerless. It's when we're not spending as much time with God as we should be. And the other fear the first fear that we're to admit that we're worthless, and I forgot the other fear. It was right there. There's a fear to admit that we're worthless and there's a fear to admit, almost in a way, that you know we can't repay God, because I feel like so much time was spent.
Speaker 1:When I was a kid, people were telling me you can't repay God, so don't try to. He does love us just the way we are. He loves you just the way you are. He accepts you as you are and it's created this identity within our hearts that I don't have to repay God. Oh, I'm just. He just loves having me around. You know, I'm blessing God with my presence because he just wants me here and we become spoiled little brats. That's what we become. We become the prodigal son that was so vindictive and rude and evil and giving my inheritance Father becoming like that.
Speaker 1:We become so full of this idea as Christians that we can't repay God, which we can't that we ignore the fact that, just because we can't, there should be a desire to repay God. This is not, you know, I don't know how to word it, but we get so stuck on the fact that we've been told for most of our time that we shouldn't repay God because, or we shouldn't try repaying God because you never will that it's almost like people have accepted this and empowered themselves with it and deceived themselves with it. They don't realize that there's still a, there should still be a desire to repay God. It's the desire to respect God, a desire to love God, a desire to fear, you know, losing this. We take those things. And we take the things like how many times will I forgive you? 77 times, 7. And we're like God's always going to forgive me. Why would I ever change? He's just going to forgive me and I'll just ask for forgiveness. And I mess up next time and we become empowered by these verses in the wrong ways.
Speaker 1:They've been twisted and they've been manipulating us into getting this idea that you know God is. God is happy that I'm here at church today. God is is go to me, being. Oh, god is going to bless me because I'm here at church. We're doing the most basic of things and expecting God to be like over, over, like joyed, and I'm sure the first time you did you did that. He was like wow, that's awesome, cool, I'm so glad you came to see me or I'm so glad you came to spend time with me.
Speaker 1:But it's like, because we've been told that we can't repay God, we've lost a sense of respect for God. We're just like oh well, I can't repay him anyway. Too bad, so sad. And it's almost like I think of that dog. There's like this little meme where the dog's like everything's okay and the house is on fire and they're like and I'm not saying that God is fire, I'm just saying like, instead of that sense of debt that we have bringing us to all, or bringing us, you know, to respect God, it's like we keep veering into two bad ways.
Speaker 1:Either we're ashamed by it, I've got it, I've got it, I've got it. You know, we avoid it, we just like, pretend that debt doesn't exist. And so it's like there has to be a healthy ground where we say, god, I can't repay you, but that doesn't mean that I'm not going to try to, that it doesn't mean that I'm not going to spend the rest of my life thanking you, and I may never, ever, ever, repay one percent of what you did for me, but you know you deserve every part of my life, and so I'm going to sacrifice it for you. Here is my life, here is my money, here is my desires, my dreams, my wants. I surrender all of this to you. And it's never there.
Speaker 1:We always have, either we're ashamed of it, so we're like no, no, no, you can't be ashamed. God accepts you as your heart Move into His love. And then we just completely jump over the awe and jump right into my debt. Who cares All that stuff? I'm a new person. Today is a new day. The Lord has made, he has made me glad in it. All that stuff is gone, he has forgotten and all that stuff. But he's forgotten. But we shouldn't. We shouldn't forget where we came from, not in the sense of where we should let it drag ourselves down, but we should use it to empower ourselves. To empower not ourselves, but to strengthen our relationship with God, reminding ourselves of what he's brought us, to reminding ourselves of what he's done in it.
Speaker 1:I've talked about this before, like even Mary herself, who literally was pregnant with Jesus, as the shepherds and the people who were coming to visit Jesus who was just born. One of my favorite verses was that Mary looked back on this and was like treasuring this moment. I don't know the exact verse, but it's basically a moment where it's saying that Mary knew that this was something to treasure, to write down, to remember that God was being faithful, that God was loving her, that God was watching out for her and this. I feel like this totally got off track, but I just I feel like we become so. Maybe there were people that were really ashamed and couldn't move into a relationship with God.
Speaker 1:But eventually we have to move past that shame, and that doesn't mean to ignore our past. That means to accept the past. Yes, I came from this, but that very same thing that I came from is the very same thing that I strengthen. I boast in my weakness. I boast in my past, for this is what the Lord has brought me out of. I share my testimony to know, to let other people know that this is what God is capable of doing, that this is what God has done for me. I don't ignore my past and I don't ignore what God has done for me. I use it to surrender. I acknowledge. Lord, I thank you for the things that you've done Years ago. I thank you for the things that you've done weeks ago. I thank you for the things that you've done today and the things that you're going to do. We have to accept what we were, not to forget it, not to ignore it, but to accept it and thank Him. Use it as if you don't know what to pray about. Thank you God every single day for the things he brought you through. Thank you, god for the things he brought me through. Thank you, god for the things you brought me through.
Speaker 1:These are just the things that have been on my mind, and it's really weird to say that that God has been talking to me about the sense of being worthless, because that's something that, when the spirits come, it's something they always throw at me you're worthless, like you're not worth anything. They belittle and demean everything about me and I just it grows on me and it begins to I wish I was this, I wish I was that, I wish I was this, I wish I was that and a whole bunch of other things, of longing to be other things that I'm not, longing to be in different positions, that I'm not, instead of realizing you know, you're right, I'm. I'm not any of that. I'm not any of those things that you told me I'm not. I don't have any of the worth that I wish I had. I don't have any of the power that I wish I had, but God has created me in the way that I'm meant to be. That God has love for me, regardless of what I do. That doesn't matter. If you see my worth, that God sees my worth. He made me the way that I was intended to be. That I may be powerless, but I'm not alone. And because I'm not alone. Together we are powerful. I may not be the powerful one of this, you know power coupling but because I stand with Him, I don't stand alone, and because he stands with me, nothing can stand against.
Speaker 1:Anyway, as always, let's go ahead and end in prayer, because this ended up being longer than I thought it would be. Dear God, thank you for always being with us. I know I didn't do the best way of explaining this because I don't I've been really off-Lord, but I just pray that you help whoever is listening to receive something from this, and I thank you for speaking through me, with me and using me. God, I thank you for you know your word that is continuously just being revealed to us, and I pray that you help us become part of our hearts so that we can't be tricked or deceived anymore. I pray that you reveal more truths to us and help us to see the truth of your word, not what we've let it become. I pray that you forgive us of our sins, lead us not into temptation. In the name of Jesus, amen.
Speaker 1:Thanks for listening to this week's episode of HFC. I really hope you enjoyed it or got something from it. I really apologize. It's just been really out of it, but I meant to do that verse and it just kind of became something. But I pray that you receive something. Yeah, have a God bless week. See you next week. Thank you, god Bless.